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Friday, January 23, 2015

Stuck Somewhere

After thinking so much lately (driving will do that to you) it has occurred to me what has been missing and what I am trying to figure out. Creativity. Yes, I miss my creativity. I'm so wishy-washy and always have been, but the biggest thing that is always in my life is my need to be creative. With all the hustle and bustle of my new job, my creative side has kind of gone out the window. Don't get me wrong, I love my job. I love the people I work for, and I love what I do. I just want to find a happy medium. I need to find the balance between my creative self and my work self. Often wondering what I could do differently to bring that creativity back. I put a good deal of effort into my work, I work hard, but I am also finding that in order to be completely happy I need to do something else for myself.

Enter this blog again. Yes, I know I come here only every few weeks to complain or set myself up for another, "I will be back, I am committed to this blog." And who is to say that I won't do that again? Not I. But I want more. I want to enjoy this place where I am.

I am Montana. I am a life-loving, always busy, happy, creative. I will work it out. I love fashion, healthy-living, daily inspiration, and figuring out where my crazy life might lead. So I am once again putting myself out here. I am going to try to be more inspired in this space. To take more pictures and document this life. Not for others, but for myself. So here goes...


Wednesday, December 3, 2014

Oh yeah, I want a puppy.

Andy Cohen Inspired

Who could have thought a diary written by the most awesome man on Bravo television would inspire me to write a blog post today? I sure didn't. After listening to the book, The Andy Cohen Diaries, A Deep Look at a Shallow Year, all day I sat down just wanting to document and here I am.

Lately podcasts and audiobooks have ruled my life. I have especially been drawn to biographies, stories about everyday people who worked their butts off to make it in this world. Of course these people are usually the most interesting to me and I mainly love the easy listens that don't get to deep and keep the mood light. Occasionally I will listen to more of a story but usually they all have an underlying truth to them. I have always loved stories that are more real life than sci-fi.

And isn't that too what this blog is supposed to be for me? A place to read and look back on later so that I remember all these things. The little things, the big things, because lord knows I can't remember them on my own (just ask my sister). It will be pretty cool to see it all again someday. Some sort of online diary where I explain the crazy things that happened or the very boring things that happen. I am writing this for me anyway. I guess it is pretty weird that we just put all this out onto the internet. A big wide world for people to read and judge and wonder why she would even say or think those things. I guess I could just write and keep it to myself, but where is the fun in that?

So today, I drove and drove and drove some more. I actually got a good bit done work wise and came home to finish up my work with hot tea on the back porch in this unusually warm weather. Today has been a good one. I am heading to Awana at church later and I am excited to see those little ones and play some fun Christmas games. Andy is all about some Christmas spirit, and although I do love the idea of Christmas, for some reason this year I just can't wrap my head around it all. I don't even want to put up a tree at this point. Maybe I will cave sooner or later, but right now I feel ok about not having one. I am a summertime girl through and through and something about all the brown surrounding me has me weird about the weather. Maybe it is because I know the cold is coming. Who knows. Maybe my Christmas spirit is failing me because I feel like it got here too quickly. That I didn't get near what I wanted to accomplished this year and now it is all over.

Anyways, I am thankful for these moments to myself this afternoon. These moments to write it all out to whoever might be reading and get it out of my head and onto a screen. Life is good right now, I am blessed beyond what I deserve and happy with where I stand. Thankful. Maybe that is what I should pay the most attention to this season. How thankful I am for all that I have.

Thanks for sticking with the ramble. Maybe one day this blog will be cohesive. Who am I kidding? I am not even cohesive.

xoxo, Montana
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