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Friday, August 23, 2013

Moving out and Moving on

I wrote this post right before I moved out but had yet to share. It was in my drafts and just waiting to be published. I have since moved, but wanted to include my feelings during this time so that I may look back and remember. 

So here it goes, another adventure in this little life of mine. I am currently in the middle of packing up my little house and moving about 7 miles down the road. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I know it isn't that far. But the memories of this little home I have created began flooding back the past couple of nights. Sometimes I find it so crazy just to think I have only been here two and a half years, yet others it is hard to believe I have been here this long. It seems like just yesterday I was leaving home, starting a completely different life for myself, becoming a grown-up, leaving behind a town full of memories and people that helped make me who I am today. It is the times when you are packing up that all the memories come pushing back into your brain. The ones of home and college, of growing and learning, of decision-making and decision-breaking. I went through some heartaches in this little home, right by myself. I did what I wanted here, I danced around in my underwear singing in a hairbrush, I have cried, I have been sick, heartbroken, crying, laughing, downing a bottle of wine just because, celebrated friend's marriages, gotten through bad relationships, and started the best one of all. All right here in this little home

july 2013
This home taught me so much, I learned about myself here more than anywhere I have lived so far and I was blessed to call this my home. Once again I am blessed to be here in this space and sharing my words with you. ooo, Montana

Tuesday, August 20, 2013

to create is to live

peach recipes to follow

After a weekend full of fun and sun, I came home to a box full of peaches. Peaches, I had bought last week for such a great deal and just couldn't pass up. As I stood in the kitchen, carefully peeling each one, slicing them into pieces and putting them into the freezer or to make jam, this thought ran across my mind. I like to create. I like to make things, from peach preserves to sewing a pillow, creating is where my heart lies most days. But in one way or another, don't we all just want to create? Create a better life for those that we have around us, create more things that bring us or our friends/family joy. Create this little space on the internet that we can call ours. Creativity is much more than being artsy or making something with your hands, its making anything that you can call your own. I want to create a better life for myself, one that is full of the things and people I enjoy, and I want to help those around me be there best creative selves. I am striving each day to make creative choices, ones that might seem different to those on the outside but are just right for me. I am hoping that the creativity in me inspires someone, either in my everyday life or here on the internet. Peaches... who knew they could spark such a thought? 

This is the second of my early morning posts, and I am starting to get the hang of it. So blessed to wake up each day to pour my heart out onto these pages. ooo, Montana

Friday, August 16, 2013

A New Morning

This marks the first of my morning blogging so bare with me. It's early and I am trying to get into a new habit of getting the thoughts from my head onto this screen a little earlier. 

All mornings are a fresh start, a whole new day to take on another dream or goal. In a lot of ways I feel like mornings are God's way of giving us a do-over. A brand new day that we can better serve him, be a better example to others, or just treat ourselves and those around us with the utmost respect. I like mornings, I always have. Lots of the mornings of my childhood were spent up with the animals, feeding the horses in their stalls, getting ready for a show on a weekend. Those moments before a crack of light came into the sky were special to me. A typical morning before a horse show included so many things, from ironing our show shirts, to giving those horses one last grooming before we put them in the trailer, the mornings were when it happened. There are many of those times that stick out more than the rest, but one of my favorites is still embeded in my memory.

a late night hike recently

It was a cool morning, early fall probably, and the day before had been spent in Perry, Georgia. After one show we immediately headed to another in South Carolina. I was tired, he was tired but he made it a point to let me have a good time as soon as we got to the hotel. We jumped on the beds. Literally jumped, this became a little tradition that has always happened, even to this day. We stayed up late into the night working on some tie-downs for the horses. Showing was a way of life, and a way we made our money, so it was important to win the next day. We tied rope until our fingers were tired and I am pretty sure I passed out long before daddy. The next morning we woke up early and headed out to the show grounds to feed the horses first. It was still dark outside and I can still smell the hay and grain. While the horses were eating, and they always ate before we did, we headed over to the local IHOP. I remember the menu and ordering the "pigs in a blanket". This was the first time I had heard a food called this, and I made a big deal about it. We laughed and laughed about that for days. After eating we headed back to barn to get ready for the day. I got put on a horse to warm up and one for daddy too. After riding around the arena some, and getting the horse warmed up for the day, I decided to work on some of my circles, not noticing the lady lunging her horse in the center of the arena. When our horses met they both went opposite ways and I stayed right in the middle. Falling off hard down into the dirt. Nothing hurt but my pride. I, of course, got back on after a little coaxing from daddy, and I think we went on to have an okay day. Those tie-downs worked wonders and we got those horses to bury their butts in the dirt during their slides.

Looking back now, I lived for mornings like those, and in a way still do. Now it is all about encompassing it all, making it more than a memory, making it a part of me again. This morning is going to be a good one. I am blessed, blessed, blessed. ooo, Montana

Tuesday, August 13, 2013

Starting Over...

Once again I am back staring at this blank screen trying to figure out the words needed to fill these pages. Words usually flow easily when I am not staring at this page but once I end up here they just stop right before they come out of my fingertips. 

So here it goes again, after almost 4 weeks without home internet, I got the break that I needed and have taken on a new perspective for this whole blogging thing. And it is starting today. Today as I sit on the back porch of my newly moved in house, my blogging will be different. Sure, I plan on sharing my outfits and things that I love but I also plan on sharing my thoughts on struggling to find my place in this world. From my ups and downs, highs and lows, I want to get it out of my brain and into this blank page. So to start it off right I would like to introduce myself.  

So I guess I will start with me. 

-First and foremost I am a Christian, yes I struggle with my exact beliefs and how it all fits together, but I also have faith that the Lord is watching over me, he sent his Son to die for me so that I may be born again. Yes, I sin daily, I make mistakes, I think things I shouldn't, but at the end of the day I know He is there.

-My family means everything to me, we are a little weird, we are a little crazy, but we are a family. As I have gotten older, I began to realize that everyone has things about them and their families that are different, those that seem perfect aren't and those that seem to be hanging on by a thread can usually hang on for a while. And while I once thought that we were the weird ones, we might all just be weird, just weird and different in our own ways. I am learning that love keeps everyone together.

-I am a talker, I like to speak to everyone, from the cashier at the grocery store, to the guy walking down the street, I try and make it a point to at least say hello, most times I even strike up a conversation. I just like to know about others, to know that they are okay, at least in that moment, and speaking to them usually shows me that. 

-I am indecisive. My Mama and I decided we would call it multi-faceted, because it sounds better. It probably sometimes comes off like I am non-committal or something like that, but I just like to think it is because I haven't found my niche yet. I haven't figured out that one thing that makes me tick. I am determined to reach it, to pull it into my arms and trust in my heart that I have found my thing, until then I will be multi-faceted.

-There are moments in time that I just like to stop. I make it a point to thank the Lord for those moments. I pray right then and there and tell Him thank you. All different things make me stop in those moments, from the most perfect sunset, to a sweet, sweet moment with Andy, to the times when my family is all gathered together and things seem like they couldn't get more amazing. I live for those moments.

-I like to dance, I am not usually very good at it, and only think I get better after a few cocktails, but I sure love to do it. I like to dance at weddings, at the bar, in my car, at home with Andy, and even by myself in the shower. I tend to think that dancing makes it all go away. It will always bring a smile to my face and a little two-steppin can turn my mood around in a nano second.

This list could easily go on for pages and pages but I think I will stop there. These are the first ones that come to mind when thinking of interesting (or uninteresting) things about myself. I like to read these kinds of posts about others, so I figured some may like to read these things about me to. I saw a bit of advice on a blog I read, "write a blog you would want to read", although now I am not sure whose that was on, so if you know please leave it in the comments. 

Anyway, I am back, and at a place of starting over once again. Blessed to be in this place, and blessed to find the words to fill these pages. ooo, Montana

linking up with Shanna.
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